[fic] A Game You Can't Control

[littledeerxing9]

INFO & TAGS:

WC:9,520
TAGS: au-office space, hidden workplace romance is the gossip, from jake's pov, unserious, mild sexual content implied, silly and fun

There’s something about Jungwon.

Jake doesn’t know it until he moves departments, it’s inconsequential but he’ll learn how important Jungwon will be to him in time. According to Sunghoon, “Everyone would kill for a desk here,” He smiles. Jake tilts his head, as Sunghoon’s smile grows; Jake’s got the world’s “best view” of Jungwon Yang’s desk. Jake thinks it sounds weird, almost makes him say something to him— “Welcome Jake-ssi,” Jay is coming by to introduce himself.

Jake waves his hand dismissively, “We don't have that culture here,” 

Jay knocks his elbow into Sunghoon’s side hard. Sunghoon grunts in pain but Jake can see the smile dawning on his face, “Still,” Jay smiles with all his teeth, “Welcome. I  hope Sunghoon isn’t causing you problems. If he is, please let me know. I’ll take care of him.” Jay’s face is stoic then, and Sunghoon stops leaning against Jake’s desk as Jake frowns. 

“Take care of him?” Jake starts, “You sound like you’re going to kill him.”

Jay smiles, like Jake’s said the funniest thing in the world before Jungwon walks in with Sunoo. “Oh! Jake Sim, welcome!”

Jake stands up to shake his hand, “Don't hesitate to ask about anything,” Sunoo follows with.

“Will Jay kill Sunghoon?” Jake jokes and Sunghoon moves to stand by Jungwon. Jay is on Jungwon’s other side, smiling again in amusement at Jake’s words. 

Sunoo’s laugh travels as Jungwon answers, “Probably. It’s okay though,” He states as Jay hooks his arm with Sunghoon’s and leads him away. Jay is leaning into him, jaw hard but Sunghoon is chuckling softly. “They’ve been married for 10 years, I think it’s their love language or something.” 

Oh ! Jungwon raps his knuckles on the top of Jake’s desk, “Well, I’ll be at my desk. Really, don’t hesitate to ask for help.” Jake preens as Jungwon walks off. He looks relaxed, cool and that’s when he sees a glint— a ring on his finger. Sunoo lingers around, knowing expressions as Jake’s morphs into that of intrigue. 

Sunoo leans forward on the desk, his lanyard swinging between them distractingly as he speaks. “I have a secret to tell you.” 

Jake looks away from Jungwon’s retreating frame, met with a mischievous smile adorning Sunoo’s features. 

-

Let’s rephrase this— There’s something about Jungwon’s husband .

First off, Jake is stupid. Let’s start with that strong base. Jake prides himself in his work, in his attentiveness but, missing a wedding ring on a coworker’s finger a week into working with them seems like such a minor thing to miss. Hell, he didn’t even know Jay and Sunghoon married until he was told. He chucks it up to the fact that they weren't in the same department, that he was skirting around having to do the first week awkward interactions until he settled into a groove but, that excuse falls apart when he realizes his desk is in front of Jungwon’s.

Sunoo had told him in hush tones: “We’re trying to figure out who he’s married to.”

“Why?”

“He never brings him around to hang out. He’s apparently been married for a couple years now.”

Jake doesn’t think it’d be such a hard thing to ask but Jay tells him two days later that Jungwon can be finicky about personal things. “He’s like a cat, you have to stick your palm out and just let him come to you first.” 

“What if he’s just wearing the ring so people don’t ask him out?” Jake offers. Jay’s eyebrows shoot up as he continues, “Isn’t he kinda popular for being pretty?”

Jay doesn’t answer but he hums. 

But Jake gets a little token for his patience two months later. It comes up randomly in the break room, Jake knocks over the reminder of creamer all over the counter and Jungwon laughs at his demise. Jake’s eyebrows furrow and he mutters out, “Heeseung is always telling me to watch where I’m going. I swear I knock over things way too often.”

Jungwon smiles over his mug, a glint in the corner of Jake’s eye as he says: “Yeah, maybe you’re just as accident prone as my husband. He’s always breaking things, we’ve just assumed he’s got bad luck for life, ya know?” 

Jake feels the wire connecting in his brain as that “glint” of Jugwon’s wedding band comes back into focus and “Oh my god, Jungwon is actually married…” Jake whispers in disbelief when he’s recounting the day back to Heeseung later.

Heeseung doesn’t peer up from his computer when he answers, “I would assume having a wedding band on and calling someone your ‘ husband ’ implies that, yes, you are in fact married.” And okay, maybe Heeseung has a point but damnit , Jake would rather get stuck doing their laundry for a month than to ever admit Heeseung was ever right ever . Heeseung seems to know this when he finally looks up, over his glasses and smiles. Jake leans over to push Heeseung’s glasses up higher on the bridge of his nose hard, grumbling in annoyance as he leaves the room. 

But it’s after such a small comment made in passing, the pieces of the puzzle falling in place as he just pays more attention. Heeseung will tell him he’s making a mountain out of a molehill because work has been stagnant as a year is coming up now and Jake will deny it through his teeth. “Gossip makes the world go round, baby.” Sunoo would say. Yet, nothing feels like gossiping more when it happens in the very same break room again. 

Sunoo, Jay, and Sunghoon are complaining about the dumb morning email chain happening in the department when Jungwon walks in with his lunch— smiles and all as usual and no one bats an eye at the tellings of a fucking hickey poking it’s ugly purple head out of the collar of Jungwon’s shirt. Jake can’t not see it as Jungwon moves around. 

It’s even more maddening when Jungwon doesn’t acknowledge it, continuing lunch like normal and chiming into whatever the hell Jay and Sunoo are getting into. He doesn't notice Jake staring just a bit too long before he’s checking his watch and groaning. “Damn, forgot about the project meeting today. Going to have to leave early guys.” He huffs as he packs the remainder of his things and smiles once more, “See you all tomorrow?” 

A couple strings of ‘ sures ’ and ‘ yes ’ before he’s gone and Jake sits there, his fork halfway to his mouth with pasta and Jay finally pipes up, “Did anyone else see the hickey?” 

Sunghoon stabs his fork down hard into his lunch just as Jake’s eyes finally snap back to his other coworkers, “He didn’t even say anything.” Sunghoon swirls his fork around, “He simultaneously talks about his husband more nowadays while also not , We are nowhere near being close to finding out who it is.”

“Wait, so they've like formed a club or something to find out who Jungwon’s husband is?” Heeseung chimes in, pausing his hand as he wipes cum off Jake’s thighs. Jake leans up, pushing Heeseung’s glasses back up the bridge of his nose as he nods enthusiastically. It’s not ideal pillow talk but Heeseung had asked about work. It's a bit silly to look back at it now, to think they were all so invested in this with everything they know but it keeps morale a little up when it was happening. Heeseung be damned.

And with the hickey incident, Jake is properly inducted into the club. It’s a shitty little club and really an excuse to go out for drinks after work Jake realizes a couple months in. Heeseung shows up from time to time, usually to pick up a drunk Jake and Jake really is grateful. But then they start inviting Jungwon along. He can hear Sunoo asking from his desk every time but Jungwon always has a reason. 

Just as they’re about to give up, Jungwon agrees to go. He seems happy to be there and Jake is too. Everything aside, Jungwon is finally hanging out with them. Jungwon giggles and laughs and falls into them so easily… I mean really a truly sweet guy but fuck all, Jake wants to know who he’s married to. Jungwon pouts around his buffalo sliders as he skims a new text. Jay makes a face before he asks, “What's wrong?” 

Jungwon locks his phone, shoving the slider into his mouth as he grumbles, “I invited my husband to come out with us and he just let me know he’s staying late again because of a new deadline.” And oh shit , they were so close to meeting the man. 

Sunoo pipes in then, “What does he do?”

Jungwon wipes his mouth, “Oh, he works with us. In the props department.”

Jake nearly rips the door off its hinges when he gets home and Heeseung looks up from his phone, “His husband works with us!” Jake slams the door behind him before he’s pressing himself into Heeseung’s body and yells out, “He was right under our noses the whole time!”

Heeseung pulls him close, kisses him as a greeting before he asks, “Did you get a name?”

They didn’t fucking ask for a name! Jake is going to scream and cry and throw up— the world is a cruel, cruel world.

-

Okay. So.

Sunoo and Jake may or may not have spent the whole morning scanning through the list of employees to see if they can get a lead. No Yang ’s in the rooster and all hope is lost… again. Beomgyu, from props, is hounding Yunjin in the break room when they finally give up. Jake sits up, “Beomgyu from props,” He whispers to Sunoo and Sunoo is on his feet.

Yunjin looks like Sunoo is he’s her savior when he comes up, tugging on Beomgyu’s sleeve, “Sorry Yunjin, I need to steal Beomgyu for a moment.” Yunjin smiles, nodding and Jake can see her taking her food out the microwave and booking it out of the room before Beomgyu can realize it. 

And poor Beomgyu, lost as ever, is forced to sit across from Jake by Sunoo. “What is going on?”

Sunoo sits back by Jake. He leans forward on his elbows, hands clasped under his chin as he puts on a show. Jake tells Heeseung later that Sunoo was kinda hot when he did it, only to have his boyfriend ask if Jake thinks Sunoo is cute. “This is about Jungwon,” Jake strains to say before he continues. 

“You know something we want to know,” Sunoo starts, “Do you know Jungwon Yang?”

Beomgyu shrugs, “Isn’t he your executive production designer? The mean one that’s always up my fucking ass about deadline?” 

Yikes , “Yes!” Sunoo says, “We wanted to know if you know who he’s married to?”

Beomgyu scrunches his nose,” No,” he drawls, “Should I?” Sunoo’s smile falls, before he dramatically splays himself across the table top. 

Jake offers a strained smile, “He’s married to someone in props and we don’t know who. It’s kinda like a mystery in our department. Is there anyone married to props?”

Beomgyu is amused. He offers no help when he says, “Nearly everyone is married in props…”

Heeseung laughs as Jake rolls around the bed. “So what's the game plan now?” 

Jake looks up at the ceiling, “I don't even know.”

-

There’s a glimmer of hope the next month when he sees Niki Nishimura hanging around Jungwon’s desk in the morning. It’s early enough for there to be a sparse amount of people in the office but Jake has a deadline due at noon and also a meeting at noon. He nearly cried at home when he realized he’d have to be in the office three hours earlier than usual.

Niki is talking animately and Jungwon is listening intently, Jake nearly topples over his desk trying to hear the conversation but decides he should just leave it. Niki is kind of known for being a pain in the ass about work the way Jungwon is. It would make sense they’re friends. Jake can see Jungwon raise an eyebrow at whatever Niki has said before Niki is raising his hands, Jake can see the wedding band on Niki’s ringer finger glint in the light. Jake gasps.

He doesn’t think they've seen him but he still attempts to hide behind his computer as Jungwon stands up. Niki laughs again, the look on Jungwon’s face is nothing short of adoration. Jungwon says something softly and Niki nods, but the next thing that happens has Jake shake Heeseung’s shoulders as he tells him later. Jungwon brings a hand up, tender in touch as he caresses Niki’s nape and leans forward. Niki meets him halfway, a kiss shared between two lovers— in the pocket of the morning before the sun has even risen, Jake sees love spilling out of Jungwon’s gaze when they pull away. 

Niki pulls away and walks around the desk to pull Jungwon in again. Jake’s heart fills with warmth as Jungwon’s laugh carries, “Niki!” He whines, silenced with another kiss and it’s all so sweet. Jake really is spying and he wonders if Jungwon hadn’t openly told them for the sake of Niki. 

Jungwon seems to love his husband openly, no qualms about pda as Niki presses into his side, squeezing him tight before he has to go work. In the stillness of their office, as their chuckles subside, Jake sees them fall in love again. Jungwon kisses Niki once more, on the lips, nose, cheek and under his jaw. Niki has his eyes shut, basking in affection as Jungwon tells him with the most earnestness Jake has ever heard in his voice, “I love you. I’ll miss you.” 

Niki pushes his nose into Jungwon’s palm. His gaze is bursting with emotion and Jake knows what that is: unadulterated love. Jake feels it with Heeseung. When time suspends for just a bit longer, with pockets of time where Jake swears Heeseung is the only person in the world. With all his love and all his being, in the same way Jake can feel, Niki whispers: “I love you.” 

Jake finally looks away, watching the steam coming off his cup. He decides then, that it’s not his place to tell the others.

-

Jake hadn’t thought about the “incident” anymore after Niki had left. Really hadn’t had time to think much of anything before Jungwon corners him after his meeting. 

Jake’s first reaction is to jerk in his seat when Jungwon sits down. The water in his cup sloshes onto his lap as he sees a tight smile on Jungwon’s face and his hands clasped— Jake has never been more intimidated. “I know you know,” Jungwon tells him. It’s a statement, an irrefutable fact that Jake thinks of a way to weasel his way out of when Jungwon phrases it like that and couples it with a gaze that Jake never wants to be on the receiving end of again. 

“It sounds like he was going to kill you,” Heeseung hums sleepily, nose pressed under Jake’s ear. Jake waves his hand in the air even though he knows Heeseung isn’t looking. “It’s because I know he would’ve,” 

Jungwon huffs, his features softening as he speaks, “Look, I’m only going to ask you not to tell,”

Jake shakes his hands, “I wasn’t going to,”

Jungwon raises his eyebrow at that. “Why? Don’t you guys have a little club going?”

“You know about that?” Jake says all choked. He was sure they were ‘sneaky’ about it. He slumps into his seat as Jungwon gives him a lot.

Heeseung sits up on his elbows, “So it is a club?” Jake swats at Heeseung’s face gently, pushing him back down as he huffs,  “Listen to me,”

Jungwon shrugs, “Sunoo talks really loudly and one time Jay texted me thinking I was Sunghoon about it.” Jake remembers that. Jungwon hadn’t let on that he saw it. Jay had bemoaned with embarrassment for days, weeks after and hadn’t relaxed in the office for a month afterwards knowing that there was a possibility that Jungwon had seen that. Jay actively avoided being alone with Jungwon at any costs; Even if it brought on awkwardness like the time he dragged Jake with him to Jungwon’s desk to hand Jungwon the finalized designs he needed to turn in. 

Jake and Jungwon had smiled at each other even though Jay hid partially behind him. It was weird. 

“What do you have Jungwon saved as if you got us mixed up?” Sunghoon had asked and Jay turned red. They never find out what he had Jungwon saved as. 

Jake curls in on himself, “It’s not anything bad,”

Jungwon’s expression lets up, gentle as he replies, “I know,” 

“Then why not tell them?” Jake finally asks. Why would Jungwon keep it hush hush? Oh my god, does the company know? 

Jungwon leans on to his arm, “When Niki and I got hired here, we didn’t want to be known for being married to each other. Kind of like Jay and Sunghoon, or Minjeong and Sungchan… we wanted to be two individual people. Niki is also…” Jungwon’s voice tapers off as he waves his hand in the air, “He’s a bit shy and I wanted to respect that.”

Jake gets it. People in the office, him included, talk about other coworkers, theorizing, guessing about their lives. Sunoo had nearly flipped out when he found out Jake was engaged. Well, Sunoo had nearly pissed himself when they first met Heeseung too, boasting about it to Jay and Sunghoon the following week about how he had met the hottest guy. Okay, so maybe it’s mostly Sunoo. But Jake can understand where Jungwon and Niki are coming from. 

Jake nods with finality, “I won’t tell,” 

The smile Jungwon offers him is beautiful, genuine and Heeseung elbows him when he tells him so. “I don’t have hot coworkers, stop talking about them.” He jokes. Jake laughs, pressing into Heeseung’s body as they lull to sleep. Jake thinks it’ll be easy to hide this secret. Jungwon’s already doing it, how hard can it be?

-

Hiding Jungwon’s secret has proven to be harder than he thought.

Jake didn't notice just how much Niki and Jungwon are together during office hours. It makes sense, Niki is the props department leading designer and Jungwon being their executive production designer— they have to communicate always. Nothing would get done between their departments if they didn’t. Sunghoon probably would finish his storyboards three weeks past their date…. maybe a week after if Jay keeps him in check. Jake thinks he wouldn’t be able to polish shit up if Soobin from props didn’t send him prototypes through Niki. You get it…

But again, now that he knows they’re married to each other, he nearly freaks when he’s walking back from the break room with Sunoo and spots them a little too close. Sunoo makes a jest at the idea of a threesome he’s been trying to get Jake to agree to and Jake takes the opportunity to laugh forcefully. 

Jungwon’s head snaps in their direction as Jake says loudly, “You’re so funny, Sunoo.”

Jungwon watches as he pulls away from Niki, taking the binder out of his hands and curtly tells him goodbye. Sunoo doesn’t even see Niki reach over and squeeze Jungwon’s arm before he’s gone. “Why are you laughing like that?” Sunoo frowns. 

Jake sags in his desk chair once Jungwon winks at him. A subtle thank you for looking out and Jake gets to live another day. Sunoo comes into his view again, “I’m serious, we should fuck, your fiancé is hot, you’re hot and most importantly, I’m hot…”

Jake rolls his eyes, “I’ll talk to Heeseung, if that makes you feel better.”

Sunoo brightens, “It does. I’ll leave you to it, baby.” Sunoo pouts, leaning forward to caress under Jake’s chin endearingly. Now, it has the slow flame of arousal licking under Jake’s skin. “I’ll miss you.”

(Heeseung pulls back from sucking on Jake’s bottom lip: “Do you wanna fuck Sunoo?”

Jake rolls away from Heeseung’s grasp, pulling his hand out of Heeseung’s sweats. “We are not talking about this when I have a hand on your dick.”)

-

Jake is struggling to keep his cool.

Sunoo won't leave his side and now that he knows who Jungwon is married to, he can’t stop seeing them together everywhere. Seriously, how did the club not notice this? Niki is usually hovering around their department when they’re not busy, or bringing Jungwon lunch, or when they’re all heading home, Niki is waiting by Jungwon’s car. 

The relationship between Sunoo and him has had to escalate faster than he wanted solely for the reason that he feels the need to cover for Jungwon. He can see the gratefulness in both of their expressions when they realize just what Jake has done, even if Jake doesn’t really know Niki, it’s Niki who smiles the biggest when they meet eyes. Even if Jake’s stomach is swirling with excitement and fear as Sunoo drags him to a dark corner of the office ‘ for fun’.

“Do you really care about them?” Heeseung asked, his fingers working over his tense shoulders. Jake leaned into it, hummed and relaxed. Heeseung allowed the silence to hang for a second before he asked, “So when’s Sunoo coming over again?”

Jake doesn’t even realize how much harder he’s made it for himself when he had asked Heeseung with full transparency about whether or not they wanted to pursue Sunoo. They had agreed to take it slow, but then Jake spots Jungwon and Niki making out by one of the sound stages. He blanks, stopping in his steps and Sunoo bumps into his back. “Jake?”

Jake whispers an apology to Heeseung for not taking it slow as he loudly calls for Sunoo. Sunoo looks at him oddly but drops the question on his tongue as Jake pulls him from the front of his shirt and kisses him. Sunoo has his arms full of bolts of fabric they were going to take to props, digging into Jake’s ribs and he nearly drops them. Jake pulls back enough to whisper, “Drop the bolts and I won’t let you fuck me.” 

Sunoo hums, connecting their lips again and Jake almost loses himself in it before he remembers why they’re kissing. He opens an eye and sees Jungwon all flushed, watching them in shock. Jake waves his hand comically and Niki moves to fix Jungwon’s shirt, planting a kiss on his cheek before he’s jogging into the open sound stage door and Jungwon gathers himself. 

Once Jungwon leaves, Jake pulls away. Sunoo is smiling all big and stupid and it has Jake’s stomach flipping the same way it does when Heeseung looks at him. He feels small under Sunoo’s gaze, “Will you really let me fuck you?”

Heeseung nearly purrs as Jake tells him later, “I wanna see him fuck you please.” 

Jake is going to lose his mind by the end of the year.

Especially since Jungwon and Niki don’t make the effort to hide it. Not really.

Jake has had a quiet week… too quiet actually. Sunoo is holding his hand on the way to the break room with Sunghoon and Jay when he spots Jungwon feeding Niki food. He catches a glimpse of the empty break room and the ease on Niki’s face as he leans in to kiss Jungwon in appreciation. Jake nearly drops his lunch bag and the only thing that comes to mind is to cause a scene.

Heeseung’s eyebrows furrow, “Has anyone ever told you you’re dramatic?” Jake throws the pair of socks in his hand at Heeseung’s head.

Jake pushes Sunoo into the wall by the door, loudly, nearly knocking the wind out of Sunoo in the process. He can hear a chair push out in the room just as Sunoo asks, “Jake?” Before he leans in to kiss him. Jake really has too much power, he thinks, as Sunoo melts instantly. He pushes off the wall and grabs at Jake’s body to pull him closer. 

Heeseung chuckles, “No wonder Sunoo was practically begging to come over today.” Jake rolls his eyes. 

But Jake also doesn’t really think. Sunghoon gasps, “Sunoo’s a homewrecker!” 

Jake pulls off, breath coming in harsh as Sunoo smiles all dopey. “My home isn’t being wrecked!”

He tugs on Sunoo’s wrist, leading him into the break room and it’s empty. Thank god but Jake doesn’t think he’s ready for the conversation he’s about to have when he catches the look on Jay’s face when they sit. 

“You’re lucky you’re a good fuck,” He whispers into Sunoo’s ear as he sits. Sunoo leans in for another kiss and Jake lets him. 

Sunghoon slams down his tupperware, “Homewrecker.”

Jake sighs, god he’s so woefully unprepared for this conversation. 

-

Jake is woken up by his ringtone. 

He can barely make out that it’s 4AM on the bedside clock when he picks up his phone. 

Jungwon’s voice filters in so softly, Jake almost thinks he’s still dreaming. “Sorry for waking you up Jake.” His voice is a bit shaky and Jake sits up as best as he can. 

“No, you’re fine,” Jake assures him, “What’s wrong?” 

Jake can hear cars passing on Jungwon’s end, low mumbling and Jungwon cursing on his breath. “I need help. Niki is really drunk and I’m a bit out of it… can you come pick us up?” There’s crumbling fabric on the other side, he can hear Jungwon arguing with Niki before Niki’s voice comes out loudly, “Jake, Jake, Jake!”

“Niki, Niki, Niki!” Jake huffs, already pulling himself out from under Heeseung's weight. Heeseung is beginning to stir as Jake leans forward to grab his shoes and Niki continues. “Are you coming to the party?” 

Jake laughs under his breath, standing up and nodding when Heeseung turns the bedside light on and holds the car keys up. Heeseung rolls onto his side and slides out of bed, sluggishly putting his shoes on too. “Yeah, can you let me talk to Jungwon again?” 

Heeseung is rubbing his eyes hard when Jake moves to give him a jacket, “I'll go start the car.” He says just as Jake can hear Jungwon greet him again. 

“Can you tell me where you’re at?” 

“Moondogs,” Jungwon supplies, “Our car isn’t even starting if we wanted it too.” 

Jake moves through the apartment easily, moving to pull the couch out and pulling blankets out. “Are you guys cool with sleeping over? We’re closer to Moondogs from here and you can pick up the car tomorrow.” Jake turns the lights off, locking the door before he takes the flight of stairs two at a time. 

He can hear Heeseung’s music blasting from the car, sitting idly as Jungwon talks, “Yeah, thank you Jake!”

“No problem,” Jake answers easily, hovering at the passenger door. “Just stay put, we’ll be there in two minutes.” 

“Okay.”

-

Heeseung is a lot more awake when they spot Jungwon and Niki in front of Moondogs. 

Niki runs up to the driver’s side, Jugnwon tailing behind him with a pinched expression as Niki bangs on the window. “Jaaaaake!” 

Jungwon huffs as he pulls Niki from the door to let Heeseung come out, “Hey Jake,” He groans as Niki tries to pull from his grasp. Jake comes close enough for Niki to pull his sleeve and Jungwon balks, “It’s okay,” Jake assures him, Niki’s full body weight making his knees shake. 

Niki is fisting the back of his shirt, pulling him so impossibly close and pushing his nose into Jake’s ear. He can smell the alcohol on his breath, on his shirt. Jake holds him as Heeseung introduces himself, “Sorry for the unfortunate meeting,” Jungwon smiles back. 

“Can we get in the car?” Jake asks Niki. 

Heeseung comes close, splays a palm on Niki’s back and Niki leans back into. Jake stands up fully as Niki leans into Heeseung’s chest. It’s comical and when Niki looks up, gazing up at Heeseung. Jake can see confusion cross his mind before he says, “You’re not as pretty as my husband.” 

Jungwon moves forward to swat at Niki while Heeseung laughs. He helps with bearing Niki’s weight, taking one of Niki’s arms as Heeseung takes the other. Jake follows behind, before rushing forward to open the car door, switching the child lock on. Niki topples over into the backseat and Jungwon seems the least concerned by it, pushing Niki’s legs up into the vehicle before slamming the door shut. “Okay, let's hurry before he tries to get out.” Jungwon says.

The ride is easy, Niki is mumbling incoherently into Jungwon’s lap and Jungwon hums. The only thing Jake can pick up is: “You’re prettier than him.” Jungwon thanks him before telling him he needs to go to sleep. But the climb to the apartment is hard. They’re on the second floor but the task of getting Niki up the steps proves hard. Heeseung is behind him, pushing him up and Jungwon and Jake guide him up. 

“I feel sick,” Niki warns. 

Heeseung wraps an arm around Niki’s back, pulling him back down the few steps they’ve progressed past and leading Niki towards the bushes. Niki pukes, a lot , crying when Jungwon comes up to rub his shoulders and apologizing to Heeseung when he stops. It’s easier to get him up the steps the second time, Jake runs up to open the door and Niki greets him once he’s on the second floor landing. He’s got tear streaks on his cheeks, rosy from the cool air and Jungwon looks tired at his side. “The sofa is pulled out for you,” Jake tells Jungwon as he guides Niki into the apartment. Niki tumbles forward before he unceremoniously faces plants into the pillows.

Heeseung winces but Jungwon waves them off, “He’ll be fine.” Heeseung nods reluctantly before he’s excusing himself. Jake reaches over to squeeze his arm, “I'll be there soon.” Heeseung smiles sleepily and goes. Jungwon is taking Niki’s shoes off when Jake comes back. 

Niki is half conscious, mumbling under his breath when Jungwon asks for his cooperation. Jungwon is fond, smiling and gentle as he gets Niki comfortable and once they’ve settled—  Jake can hear Niki’s even breath. 

“Want something to drink?” Jake offers. Jungwon looks up, shaking off his jacket and smiles, “That’d be nice.”

The apartment is silent, comfortably so as the tea kettle heats up and Jungwon waits at the table for Jake. Jake watches the oven clock change, the tea kettle shakes a bit at the heat and he moves their mugs closer. Jungwon smiles when Jake sets the mug infront of him and fixes his coffee in silence. 

“How did you guys meet?” Jake prompts after a beat. 

Jungwon slows his wrist, his spoon coming to full stop in his mug as he smiles. Jungwon leans onto his arm, stirring a little faster again when he asks: “Are you going to sleep anytime soon? It’s kind of a long story.” 

Oh.

=

When Jungwon meets Niki, he’s 7, newly moved into his own room, ready to start being a “big boy” and when his mother introduces the neighbors kids to him and his sister. His sister is bubbling with excitement, two new girls in the neighborhood: “Oh mom, pleeeease can they sleep over?” She asked, the puppy eyes she pulls with their dad, the very puppy eyes she’s helping Jungwon master for when she tells him to ask their parents for pizza for dinner. 

Their mother had laughed at her enthusiasm, caressing his sister's cheeks and then his after before she reminded his sister: “We have to meet them first.” And so his sister had spent the rest of the morning cleaning her room, making Jungwon sort out colors of nail polish and different volumes of Sailor Moon she had pulled down from their shelves to display on the top of her dresser. “I hope they’re nice.” She whispered when they’re done. Not that Jungwon had done much other than help her fix her already falling SHINee poster. 

Jungwon didn’t really understand her excitement, they’re just girls. His sister had other friends at school but he could tell it had meant alot to her then. Jungwon wondered what the neighbor’s son would be like, if he’d be kind or outgoing… if he’d like the things Jungwon had. Jungwon didn’t dwell much once their mother called them down a few moments after the doorbell had rung. His sister smiled, squeaked and bounded down the stairs two at a time while Jungwon still clung to the railing, two feet on one step at a time. 

Jungwon heard a lot of voices, his mother’s talking rapidly and when he finally made it to the bottom, he saw his father and presumably the father of the girls stood next to them. His father spotted him, calling him over and Jungwon greeted  the man politely before his mother asked for his presence. He saw his sister in the living room, two girls sat opposite of her talking animatedly… still no son in view. He moved to his mother, smiled and greeted the women before him before he finally saw him; A 6 year old Niki clung to the back of his mother’s legs.

Jungwon doesn’t know why but it peeved him. Niki looked at him with big round eyes, clung harder to his mother’s legs and whispered softly: “Hi.” 

Jungwon could feel his mother watching him, so he smiled big. “Hi, I’m Jungwon.” 

Niki didn’t move as his sister loudly asked if the girls could move to her room. Niki didn’t say anything when his mother suggested going to hang out in Jungwon’s room. Jungwon didn’t want Niki in his room, but he agreed. He led Niki up the stairs and Niki stood in the middle of his room unsure of where to be. Looking back on it now, Niki was probably scared, probably uncomfortable with the new change of a big move across the country and quickly meeting a new family he didn’t know. In hindsight, Jungwon should’ve led them to his sister’s room and intruded and maybe Niki would’ve been comfortable. 

It’s not like they can’t see into the room across the hall, the girl’s giggling as they hover over his sister’s cds. Jungwon watched Niki watch them. Niki sat next to him in silence, awkwardly before he talked. “I like SHINee.” Niki whispered.

Jungwon looked at him, followed his gaze to the very SHINee poster his sister had fought earlier to put up. Jungwon didn’t know why but the small comment irked him. He didn’t reply, forced to sit in silence with a boy he just met as they watched their sisters have fun across the hall. At the end of the night when they had left, their mother asked them how it went. While his sister continued to ramble on, but, when Jungwon thought of his night— there’s nothing but seething hatred for one Niki Nishimura.

“Wait,” Jake cuts in, “You hated him? Why?” He couldn’t even imagine Jungwon hating Niki. 

Jungwon shrugs, “No good reason. If I had to pick a reason, IDK kid politics?” Jungwon levels his gaze with Jake after, “Now shut up and don’t interrupt again or I’ll stop telling the story.”

Because they were neighbors and his sister was very close to Niki’s sisters, Jungwon found himself in his room alone with Niki alot. He hated it. Hated that he was stuck with Niki and that no matter how hard he tried, Niki barely talked to him. Niki would sit on the bed, knees tucked under his chin as Jungwon would lead their activities. Jungwon could’ve probably stood there in the middle of the room and Niki wouldn't have protested.

“You don’t talk much.” Jungwon finally stated one day, they’ve been forced to hang out for half a year now. Niki sat up as Jungwon continued. “Do you hate me?” 

Niki frowned, “I don’t hate you,” He stretched his legs out on the bed, “I just don’t want to make you upset. I want to be cool too.” 

Jungwon frowned, “Oh.” It’s then at 8 years old, a 7 year old Niki looking at him with an earnest expression that Jungwon started to reevaluate the uncalled for anger he harbored for Niki. Jungwon hummed, “You won’t upset me. What do you want to do today, Niki?”

The smile Niki had given him that day is the first of many Jungwon started to find beauty in. A smile reserved for Jungwon’s eyes only and Jungwon had smiled back. Niki will tell Jungwon in college that he was always intimidated by how cool Jungwon was, scared of how fast he had liked Jungwon since the first time he saw him. 

In middle school, Jungwon started to view Niki differently. He spent every day with him, nearly every hour together in the summer before Jungwon started 8th grade. Niki had started to show signs that he would surpass Jungwon’s growth spurt, wobbly knees and aching joints— all with a smile on his face. It’s half past midnight, the molten hot southern summer air blew in from the open window and their thighs pressed together as they laid on Jungwon’s bed. 

They’re getting too big to share but Niki had insisted it was cooler atop the bed than on the futon he used. Niki rolled onto his side and Jungwon adjusted his neck to see him. Niki picked at the sheets under them before he asked: “Do you like girls?” 

Jungwon hummed. He hadn’t thought about girls before, not seriously other than Wonyoung Jang at church before. At Christmas service a couple months ago, he thought fleetingly that she was beautiful. He had sat in the pew behind her, Niki next to him as he watched her turn to offer him her hand and a sign of peace. Wonyoung was beautiful but before that, he had never thought about a girl that way. He realized then that he didn’t think about Wonyoung like that. She was just… pretty.

NIki talked again, in a voice just below a whisper: “Do you like boys?” 

At 13 years old, when Jungwon thought about whether or not he liked boys, the first boy that came to mind was Niki Nishimura. Jungwon leveled Niki’s waiting gaze again, “I might.” He answered honestly. 

Niki moved to hold his hand between them, “I might too.” He replied and Jungwon smiled brightly.

“I really didn’t think about it for a couple years,” Jungwon adds, he leans further into his arm and Jake can see now he’s more sober than he is tipsy. “I felt bad about it after we got together because Niki told me he had a crush on me since he was 10 and it had taken him a lot of courage to even ask me if I was thinking about being gay. I felt bad for making him wait.”

Jake smiles gently, “You couldn’t have known.”

“I know,” Jungwon huffs, “Still felt bad about it though…:

Jake leans forward on his elbows, “So,” Jungwon looks up at him, “When did you guys finally get together?”

The summer before senior year, Niki shot up nearly a whole foot over Jungwon. He gained confidence in himself over his being, over his thoughts and it showed in the way he talked to Jungwon. Jungwon noticed it, he couldn't help but notice it and it bubbled something within him. He becomes more aware of lingering gazes, lingering touches and Jungwon basks in it. He stirred out of his thoughts from time to time by splashing water into Niki’s face.

But it’s here, again, in the comfort of Jungwon’s room when something changes again. NIki is on his side like last time, their hands held into each other’s as they hold their gazes. “Jungwon,” Niki started, it's quiet, almost drowned out by the loudness of the cicadas outside. Jungwon felt the bed dip as Niki moved closer, “I like boys.”

Jungwon held Niki’s hand tighter, “I do too.” An admission only Niki knows now.

Niki smiled, his hand coming to hold Jungwon’s cheek tenderly. “I like you, Jungwon, a lot more than I can even comprehend.”

Jungwon felt his heart press into his ribs, butterflies erupt from the pits of his stomach and lodge themselves into his throat. Niki smiled widely, thumb pressed into Jungwon’s cheek with gentle pressure and Jungwon held Niki’s hand there. Time is suspended there, with two childhood friends unraveling a foreign feeling together. Jungwon could feel his heart skip the drag of Niki’s thumb over his bottom lip before he answered: “I like you, Niki.”

“And then I had my first kiss.” Jungwon hums.

Jake swings his feet under the table, “That’s really cute,” Jungwon is smiling with love at the memory before Jake presses forward, “How did you guys get married?”

Jungwon huffs, “That’s a shorter story.”

Finals are coming up quickly and there’s a bit of tension between Jungwon and Niki. Not for anything other than Jungwon’s graduation is fast approaching, there’s a lot of ‘what if’s and ‘how’s being thought of. Niki thought they should take it easy, worry about getting through finals first before thinking about their next move. Jungwon argued that he couldn’t wait. He needed to start looking for jobs, for an internship, for a place for them to move into and Niki stopped him. “You want to move in with me?”

Jungwon looked at him like he was stupid, “You practically live in my dorm room now, why not get a place together off campus babe? Let’s move in together… officially… ” 

There’s comfortable suspended silence between them after he said it. Briefly, Jungwon had thought he had something wrong—  that they were not on the same page about this. But, Niki pulled Jungwon’s legs into his lap, squeezed his calves as they held each other’s gaze. Jungwon could feel the shift, the charge in the air as Niki looked up. Niki looked absolutely in love. “Marry me.”

Jake raises his hand up to stop Jungwon, “I’m sorry but like, he just asked after you asked him to move in with you?”

Jungwon laughs, “I mean yeah.” Jake couldn’t even think about it like that. Heeseung said he took a year to plan their engagement, to get the ring, and to find the right words. But he shouldn’t compare their relationships, Jake and Heeseung pale in comparison with their years when it comes to Jungwon and Niki.

Jungwon gasped, “You’re asking me that now?” 

Niki had nodded, nothing short of genuineness and Jungwon laughed in shock. He pulled his legs up, leaned forward to touch Niki’s nape. His palm moved to hold his cheek in awe, in disbelief before he laughed again. “Yes,” He replied, letting Niki squeeze his hand and kiss his palm. “Do you wanna get married next week?” Niki followed.

“Our sisters were our witnesses and we all split the money so we could pay for the court fees and the legal fees to change my name, did you know it’s like a whole thing to change your name?” Jungwon frowns, he fiddles with his wedding ring like it’s a nervous tick. Jungwon takes a big sip of his coffee before he continues, “Seriously, we came so woefully unprepared. The marriage license is like sixty dollars, which is fine, but damn, I had to make a petition to change my name. Then like make an announcement about my fucking name change in a newspaper for a whole month before I could even get my petition approved and it’s was almost like two hundred bucks.”

Jake laughs, “Don’t even get me started on that boring ass hearing, Jake.” Jungwon rubs his face and then smiles tight.

Jake hums, “So your last name isn’t Yang anymore?” 

“Not since I was twenty-three,” Jungwon nods, “It was worth it. All that court mental gymnastics for the way Niki smiles everytime he looks at my license or when we have to do something with our documents.”

Jake thinks it’s cute. “Jungwon Nishimura, doesn’t exactly roll off the tongue.” He teases.

Jungwon snorts, “Jake Lee sounds like a bad porn star name.”

Jake raises his hand, “Okay. Stop.” Jungwon smiles big again and Jake reciprocates.

“Will you ever talk to Niki about telling your friends?” 

Jungwon looks at the sofa, a passed out Niki nearly toppling over when he answers. “I want to.”

He looks back at Jake. “But it’ll have to wait just a bit more.” Jungwon moves from the table, walking over to push Niki further up on the sofa. Niki lets out a soft groan and Jake can see the tenderness in Jungwon’s expression. Jungwon moves to get comfortable as Jake cleans up when Jungwon speaks up, “Jake?”

When Jake turns around, Jungwon is holding a sweater… the sweater Sunoo had left the last time he came over. Jake knows Jungwon knows it’s Sunoo. Jake walks over and takes it from him, “Let’s not talk about it,” Jake strains.

Jungwon nods, “Goodnight Jake.”

“Goodnight.” He hums, turning the kitchen light off and running to his room. He’ll have to talk to Sunoo about leaving shit lying around next time.

-

After the whirlwind of Saturday night, Jake begrudgingly realizes he has to pull one more early morning on Monday. 

But this Monday brings one, Niki Nishimura sat in his desk chair. “Hello?”

Niki looks up from the framed photo Jake put up last week of him and Heeseung, suddenly self conscious but the bouquet of flowers sitting on his desktop finally comes into view. “Oh what the fuck, Niki?”

Niki hums softly, “A thank you.” He stands up, a heavy hand on Jake’s shoulder. Jake can see the sincerity dawning NIki’s expression. He means it, for all the little things and Jake moves to hold his hand still on his shoulder. Niki smiles gently, “Really, thank you Jake.”

“It’s no problem.” Jake whispers. He can hear the main door to their department opening, the telltale sign it’s Sunoo based on the jingle of his keys. Niki knows too, he pulls away and smiles once before leaving. Jake stands there, looking down at the flowers before he pulls the little note on the top. 

Jungwon’s writing is familiar: for all that you do N.Y. J.N

Jake smiles big, taking a picture of it before sending it off to Heeseung. He basks in the scent of the bouquet when Sunoo cuts in: “Who got you flowers?” 

Jake pockets the note before he answers easily, “Heeseung.” 

Sunoo smiles big, “That’s sweet.” And fortunately, he lets it go.

It’s easy to pass it off once but twice. “What the fuck?” Jake says when he comes back from…. something with Sunoo during his lunch break. There’s another bouquet this time but of fruit, chocolate covered strawberries and a gift card to Starbucks sitting in the middle of his desk. Jake is still tucking his shirt back into his slacks when Sunoo comes up behind him and gasps. 

“Heeseung again?” Sunoo moves to pull a strawberry off the display. “Weren’t we just on the phone with him?” He asks before his eyes grow big. He pulls a small card from the other side of the basket: “‘ For being kindhearted N.Y ’ Who the fuck is N.Y?”

Jake finally moves forward, taking the card and pocketing it. “Probably no one to worry about.” 

Sunoo frowns and Jake rolls his eyes. “I’m worried,” Sunoo voices, “I just got you.” 

Jake hums as he works to make space for his keyboard again before the words register in his head. He pauses to see Sunoo's frown deepens before Jake raises an eyebrow at him, “Got me?”

Sunoo smiles again, “I would hope so. We just spend our lunch hour on facetime with your fiance as we fu--,”

Jake covers his mouth, “Okay, I get it.” 

Sunoo is a little shit really. But that doesn’t stop the gifts from coming. Jake corners Jungwon after Niki leaves a cup of coffee on his desk, “I told him to stop, I swear.” Jungwon admits. 

“Why then?” Jake asks. If there’s no reason to continue to do it, especially after the second time, then why? Sunghoon and Jay saw the take out Niki had left him a couple days ago which launched their entire lunchtime conversation into that about who’s trying to court Jake.

“Maybe it could be Kai from marketing?” Sunghoon relented. Jay stops from where he’s picking at Sunghoon’s plate. Sunghoon shrugged under his gaze, “Just throwing something out there.”

Sunoo chimed in. “Well whoever it is,” He huffs loudly to no one in particular, “They better stop, he’s mine.”

Jake places a hand on Sunoo’s thigh, getting a smile in return. Jake likes Sunoo’s possessiveness but it’s a little embarrassing at work. “Why? Isn’t it cute?” Heeseung asked. He’s folding laundry across from Jake, who’s got bolts of fabric to sort through. 

“It is but—“ Jake can see the way Sunghoon and Jay squirm in their seats. Still a bit weirded out by the recent development between the two. It’s a bit weird for Jake but only in how fast everything is going. Sunoo is easy to be around but: “We’re still talking about the fact that you’re encouragement is the reason the guys think someone new is trying to fuck me!”

Sunoo

heeseung…

someone is trying to fuck our guy

Heeseung

???

Jake

NO ONE IS TRYING TO FUCK ME

Sunoo

[image attached] nothing going on??? 

he’s getting a bouquet from one ‘N.Y’

i’ll keep you updated 

Heeseung

thank you sunoo 

you’ll be rewarded generously when you get home

Jake likes the implication of that. His mind wanders briefly to the possibilities before he hears Sunoo giggling from his desk. Jake pulls up the individual texts between Heeseung and him then.

Jake

stop encouraging him

Heeseung

why?

he’s cute

-

“Can I talk to you?” 

Jungwon looks up from his screen, “Yeah, What’s up?”

Jake looks over his shoulder, he catches Kyungmin looking over at them before looking away, not so subtly. “Privately?” Jake tacks on knowing that the only private place is the bathroom on the far end of the building. Based off the moment of realization dawning Jungwon’s face before it’s full of concern again, he knows that too. “I swear it’s just to talk.” Jake reiterates as Jungwon starts to lead the way. 

Jungwon hums, “I know.” 

The hallway leading to the bathroom is empty again, no sign of life as Jake knocks on the bathroom door to be safe and winces when it creaks loudly as they open it. Jake runs to check the stalls, empty , as Jungwon locks the door. Jake turns to face Jungwon when he knows it’s safe and lets it all out: “I can’t keep the secret.” 

Jungwon’s face falls and Jake nervously waves his hand. “No!” He stops, “I mean it’s getting hard for me to keep it.” 

“What do you mean?” 

Jake huffs, “You guys literally made out in front of a sound stage and I had to kiss my boyfriend who wasn’t my boyfriend at the time before I even knew I wanted him to be my boyfriend.”

Jungwon is staring when he looks back, “I’m sorry?”

“Don’t be.” Jake says, “I’m just a little stressed like maybe you should be more careful at work. I wouldn’t want you to feel pressured to say anything if you aren’t ready.” Jake knows they aren’t ready, they told him as much when Heeseung had invited them for a double date a week ago. 

Niki had taken to them more, and had told Jake he was happy they had friends. He doesn’t want to lose them. He doesn’t think he can afford to lose them. Jungwon’s face softens, “i’m sorry this happened.”

“I told you not to be.”

Jungwon shrugs, “I thought this would be easier for us.” For Niki , goes unsaid. “But I honestly can’t remember the last time all of us hung out without the looming question about my husband.”

Jake hums. He can’t remember either, he’s either always at work or with Heeseung and Sunoo. He’s been growing a relationship and also keeping a secret. Heeseung had pulled him aside last night to press him, “You’re stressed. I told you to just talk to him.”

It’s simpler said than done. But the last push was Niki kissing Jungwon openly, during regular hours by the break room and Jake is so grateful he’s alone. That he was the only one who saw it but really, they should be careful regardless of how in love they are. 

Jungwon comes close, fingers gentle on Jake’s sleeve as he whispers, “I’ll talk to him. I’ll fix this Jake.”

-

Jungwon

Is everyone free friday night ?

Jake looks up from his desk, watching as Jungwon types out his next text.

Jungwon

dinner at moondogs after work?

The group chat moves fast, everyone agreeing easily and Jake looks back up at Jungwon only to see him staring already. Jungwon smiles tightly, “Thank you” he mouths.

Jake smiles big, “Of course.”

-

Sunoo sits up, “Niki Nishimura?” 

Niki gives Sunoo a glance as he takes a seat next to Heeseung. Sunghoon’s eyes haven’t left Niki either, his hands gripping his glass hard enough for his knuckles to whiten and oh wow, maybe Niki is hated by their department. Maybe Jake should’ve just shut up and suffered in silence. “It’s actually Niki Yang hyphen Nishimura.” Niki opts for. 

Jay speaks up then, Jungwon winces at the clank of the glasses as he leans forward. “Is that why you sign emails with ‘Niki Y. Nishimura’?”

“You do that?” Jungwon asks, turning to his husband and Niki smiles. The twinkle of adoration in his eyes Jake has seen directed at Jungwon time and time again present. “Why wouldn’t I? I’m proud to be married to you, ya know?”

It’s cute. Jungwon curls into himself, very obviously failing at suppressing his smile. Niki winks at him, turning to Jake as he smiles and Sunoo gawks. The silence hangs between them awkwardly as they wait for someone to speak up, Niki is looking between them all.  Jake can feel the curling tightness in his chest as time passes. 

Sunoo looks at everyone but when he looks at Jake, they narrow. “Jake knew.” 

“Jake knew.” Niki confirms, not throwing Jake a bone.

Sunoo deflates, “I thought you loved me.” He leans into Jungwon’s side, Jake not missing the way Niki looks at them. “Jungwon, did I tell you Niki bullies me for props?” 

Heeseung pushes his glass towards Niki, who takes a sip before he answers. “You’re easy to get riled up and you need to be reminded about deadlines.” Jake can see Jay nodding along.

Jungwon smiles as Sunghoon laughs, agreeing and Niki smiles too. The tight feeling, the tension in the air… gone. Jay rolls his eyes as Sunoo continues to put formal complaints in about Jungwon’s husband, rebutting all of Niki’s comments and Jake knows they’ll be fine. Niki fits in perfectly and at the end of the night, Jungwon hugs Jake tight, “I’m so happy.” He whispers into his ear.

Jake squeezes back. “Me too.” 

The club disbanded immediately after. No need when the mystery is dead and Sunoo grumbles about work going back to being boring as they walk home. 

It isn’t until later that Sunoo sits up suddenly, jostling Heeseung behind him and Jake sinks further into the bed. “Wait! So you’re saying Heeseung knew Niki was the one sending you gifts the whole time?”

Heeseung clears his throat as he tries to get off the bed but fails when Sunoo leans his weight into him. He looks small and anxious and Jake absolutely loves this. “You knew ?” Sunoo asks.

Jake smiles in amusement at the way Heeseung crumbles under Sunoo’s gaze. Sunoo looks a bit insane as he pins their boyfriend down. It’s workplace gossip but he’s enthusiastic, gasping shortly after Heeseung shakes his head. Sunoo leans off his weight a bit, “We’re you playing along so you could fuck me?”

Heeseung gawks, “That was just a bonus! I swear,” He looks at Jake then. “Jake, tell him.” He could throw Heeseung a bone. He could tell Sunoo that Heeseung played along because he thought Sunoo was cute about “the mystery” but Heeseung also simultaneously encouraged Sunoo’s worst behavior. It gave Jake a lot more headaches that he would’ve liked to deal with.

Jake can think back to the amount of times Sunoo would get handsy the moment they clocked out. The amount of times Sunoo slept over and the amount of times he had to vaguely explain to Sunghoon and Jay why he and Sunoo are sharing clothes for the fourth time that week. Jake honestly doesn’t know how they managed to finish a production during all this time. Jake rolls on to his back, “I’m not even here right now.”

And when Heeseung lets out a scream, Jake doesn’t even turn to look.

SIDE STORY >>